• Home
  • Topics
  • Authors

Funny Quotes 905

Joey Adams

Do not worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older it will avoid you.

Richard Dawkins

By all means let's be open-minded but not so open-minded that our brains...

Winston Churchill

My most brilliant achievement was my ability to be able to persuade my wife...

P. J. O'Rourke

Everybody knows how to raise children except the people who have them.

Thomas Sowell

It takes considerable knowledge just to realize the extent of your own...

Fred Allen

I like long walks especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

Natalie Wood

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he is a baby.

Mark Twain

All generalizations are false including this one.

Margaret Mead

Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.

Carl Sandburg

I'm an idealist. I don't know where I'm going but I'm on my way.

Ronald Reagan

Recession is when a neighbor loses his job. Depression is when you lose yours.

Casey Stengel

All right everyone line up alphabetically according to your height.

Rodney Dangerfield

I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.

Oliver Herford

A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's: She changes it more often.

George Carlin

Weather forecast for tonight: dark.

Bill Cosby

Always end the name of your child with a vowel so that when you yell the...

Jerry Seinfeld

A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender but you don't have a top for...

  • 48
  • 49
  • 50
  • 51
  • 52
  • 53
  • 54

Random Quote

Denis Diderot Government

Morals are in all countries the result of legislation and government they are not African or Asian or European: they are good or bad.

Top Topicsall topics

  • Age
  • Loneliness
  • Art
  • Business
  • Amazing
  • Dad
  • Best
  • Death
  • Change
  • Education
  • Beauty
  • Faith
  • Funny
  • Experience
  • Food
  • Family
  • Movies
  • Freedom
  • Happiness
  • Cool
  • Future
  • Government
  • Home
  • Good
  • Marriage
  • God

Top Authorsall authors

  • Henry David Thoreau 141
  • Ralph Waldo Emerson 137
  • Friedrich Nietzsche 121
  • Albert Einstein 119
  • Mahatma Gandhi 117
  • George Bernard Shaw 116
  • Jerry Saltz 113
  • Mitt Romney 109
  • Oscar Wilde 106
  • Benjamin Franklin 103
  • Thomas Jefferson 100
  • Mark Twain 100
  • Francois de La Rochefoucauld 100
  • Plato 97
  • Aristotle 97
  • Barack Obama 95
  • Voltaire 92
  • Benjamin Disraeli 88
  • Marcus Tullius Cicero 88
  • Johann Wolfgang von Goethe 87
  • Hillary Clinton 86
  • William Shakespeare 85
  • Victor Hugo 85
  • Winston Churchill 84
  • Lucius Annaeus Seneca 84
  • Samuel Johnson 83
  • Samuel Butler 81
  • Ambrose Bierce 81
  • Bertrand Russell 78
  • John F. Kennedy 77

    Pages

    • Privacy Policy
    • Terms & Conditions
    • Downloads
    • Contact Us
    All Rights Reserved BestQuotesToday - 𝐃𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞 | 𝐌𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐬𝐞𝐭 | 𝐌𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 | Reach New Heights in Your Life | Elevate Your Presence Today