Adam knew Eve his wife and she conceived. It is a pity that this is still the only knowledge of their wives at which some men seem to arrive.

By and large mothers and housewives are the only workers who do not have regular time off. They are the great vacationless class.

The great secret of doctors known only to their wives but still hidden from the public is that most things get better by themselves most things in fact are better in the morning.

Husbands are chiefly good as lovers when they are betraying their wives.

I love a smart well-written show and '30 Rock ' well you can't get any better than that. Tina Fey poos funny. There's nothing that she does that isn't funny. That show is an example of how brilliant she is. It's so smart. They've done some brilliant commentary about the 'Housewives' with 'Queen of Jordan ' their show-within-the-show.

My dad is a nurse midwife one of about only 50 male midwives in the U.S. I think.

Look at Neil Diamond. Was he the cool guy? No he was the housewives' guy. He didn't try to be what he wasn't. He just did what he did - made great music was a good entertainer nice-enough guy.

Campaign behavior for wives: Always be on time. Do as little talking as humanly possible. Lean back in the parade car so everybody can see the president.

I have noticed... that men usually leave married women alone and are inclined to treat all wives with respect. This is no great credit to married women.

Wives are young men's mistresses companions for middle age and old men's nurses.

I suppose when they reach a certain age some men are afraid to grow up. It seems the older the men get the younger their new wives get.